On openness and sincerity.

I have always believed in trying to be 'open' about my weaknesses-including with my children I don't mean by this that I make a list of them to analyse; I just mean acknowledging them in a matter-of -fact way. Perhaps this  is just false modesty-I hope not.

So, I try to be open and say things like. "Well, I tried being a Principal of a school  twice but found that I did not have the necessary personal characteristics to enjoy doing it well"

To my consternation I could see disappointment and confusion on their faces

With 'twenty-twenty' vision I get the impression that this is precisely NOT what my children or teenagers wanted to hear from Dad!

Children want to be proud of their father at all costs: they want to hear of successes:

I have a problem with this because I also want to be sincere. Because I was a success in Tennis, Cricket or in the academic world, I didn't want my children to feel pressured to emulate me. I wanted them to chart their own path in life unencumbered by expectations from myself.

Now I hear things like: "Stop being so negative Dad!" or "Don't underestimate yourself!"

You can't win!

At work, too I find myself underselling myself.  Such is my fear of boasting or seeming big-headed that it seems like I almost apologise to people for my academic qualifications and experience. My friends say that I expose myself by doing this.

The problem is although I want to be sincere I also want to be valued and recognised!

It's very tricky because I have noticed that some people take me at my own face value and so I feel unrecognized in my work.

As Simon and Garfunkel say in the song:

"I'm just trying to keep my customers satisfied!" (including myself!)