An Aussie friend suggested to me recently that my identity crisis might be solved by my trying to be more Irish. She says the Aussies will accept me more if I do that.
Does that mean that instead of saying 'G'day' in the mornings I should say "'Bout Ye?" (Belfast colloquial for G'day) wear green and whistle (I can't sing) 'Roddy McCorley' as I enter the staffroom every day?
I don't think that would really work.
The problem is that I'm not really Irish.
I'm not "The Real McCoy" in the eyes of the Catholic, nationalist homelanders in that foggy and windy outpost on the eastern edge of the Atlantic ocean called 'Northern Ireland' (If you're a prod or "The North" if you dig with the other foot).
You see, being from Northern Ireland I therefore don't really know what it is to be Irish either. I can't sing or dance, except when I'm drunk and I haven't got any friends who are leprechauns. The rainbow with it's pot of gold always seems to end somewhere out in the windy Atlantic ocean. (Although the the Catholics say they have seen the the rainbow ending under a Presbyterian church in Ballymena)
To me it's all just wind and fog.
Retirement, Kota Kinabalu

This is where I would like to be after I have robbed the bank
Saturday, August 29, 2009
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